32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
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