The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
