We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
two words: eviction party
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Randomize
