She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
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totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
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