Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad