There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
It's just like the Real World with babies
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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