I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
