just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
