I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
