Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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