I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize