Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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