Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize