If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Randomize
