Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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