Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
