i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
