Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Randomize
