I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
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