is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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