lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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