Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
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