Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
