Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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