You made me cry and you don't even care
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
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