i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
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