my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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