she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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