It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Randomize
