That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
