I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
