Im at strip club and am horny
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
