What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Randomize
