So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Drake has all the answers
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Randomize