If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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