this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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