lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
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My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
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Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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