Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
