I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
