If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
smell my finger.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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