Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
