She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
