Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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