that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize