woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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