I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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