Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize