So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
