dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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