I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
PANTIES FOUND
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